Let's Hear It For the Boy (Bands)
It's good to be back after a brief sabbatical. Get away from the music and just relax for a while...Yeah, right...Seems like where ever I went everybody (young girls and middle-aged women) wanted to know what my favorite boy band was or what I thought of this boy band or that boy band. Give me a break...

Boy bands are a joke. At least by today's standards. Let's set the record straight right off before I delve into the issues and start knocking these 'boy bands'.

BOY - Any male between the ages 0 and 100 who hasn't grown up yet. We may have matured physically but mentally we still like to have our fun and don't care about the consequences.

BAND - Any group of individuals (usually 3 or more) that get together to play music with a variety of instruments. Singing is optional, but is usually expected.

With that out of the way - Hey, people!!! 'N Sync and the Backstreet Boys are not 'boy bands'. And neither are Westlife, BBMak, 98° and the like.

As far as I'm concerned they can't hold a candle to the first true 'boy band' that ever hit the record industry - Buddy Holly and the Crickets. They played their own instruments as well as wrote the majority of songs they recorded. And the music was fun. So they were still boys. Fits both definitions from above.

The next big 'boy band' that came along would have had to have been The Beatles. All boys and they played their own instruments.

So just when did this fallacy about boy bands occur? That being that any group of males singing and dancing around could be called a 'band'. You could say the Monkees but you'd only be half right. Yes - all members auditioned for their parts and they were thrown together into a situation that created a pop phenom whose one purpose was to make a lot of money off unsuspecting teenage girls. But they played their own instruments (though not on most of the recordings) and wrote a couple of songs here and there. And while we're in the early 70's you can't count the Jackson 5 or the Osmonds either.

So I guess it had to start with the dreaded New Kids On the Block and Menudo. Good looking, pre-pubescent males that made girls (and a few boys) go ga-ga with their sappy love songs and pounding syncopated back beats that grated on your mind after a couple of listens. But the girls (and a few boys) didn't care. They just fantasized about their new found idols. And the imitators followed to cash in on the new found market. Anything to bilk the public. Once the overkill subsided the bands went the way of the dinosaur and the prairie schooner.

Unfortunately, like a bad dream they were resurrected in the 90's and now we have to live through another 'I look good and can sing but don't know which end of the guitar to pluck' era. Give me a break...Please!!! Wasn't once enough? Maybe if they learn to play an instrument and stop the choreographed moves on stage I'll show them a little respect. Until that time they're just a bunch of kids feeding the teen mania frenzy and making someone a good buck doing it. Markie Mark you made the right choice...

In case you were wondering, here's my list of favorite all time 'boy bands' - - Richard Blaine
Quote of the Week
"Just as the song finished, Joey finished." - Charlotte Lasher (Joey Ramone's mother) after her son died after listening to U2's "In a Little While"

* Richard Blaine's views and opinions do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of the staff at Twin-Music.

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