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Adam
E=mc squared so I've heard, 
This is charm school, how to pull a smart bird,
Love to dance with a skank with a stiff in my pants,
You're thinking romance while I'm thinking "are they implants?"

Girl, you're better looking than my missus,
Want to give you deep love,
And then shower you with kisses,
On your pink parts, cos this Newport clart,
Is into Charm School like Da Vinci to art,
This is a Hussain education it involves sex, draw and a Playstation,
Pushing your buttons, now you're thinking that I'm tender,
Like Craig David with a hidden agenda. 

So I step to her, and say "what's up?"
I'm not much too look at but girl you're in luck,
It's not all about looks, confidence or personality,
Wide ons, hardons, loving a bit of rubsies.

Adamís charm school,
(down the bus station)
Adamís charm school,
(getting education)
Adamís charm school,
(when the bell starts ringing)
Adamís charm school,
(he donít care if youíre minging)

Eggsy
Heís the G with the CSE,
A real A* plus and they teach you for free,

P. Xain
Charm School,
Skills to rob tills,
NVQís, to City And Guilds,

2Hats
Double detention but it donít matter,
I got my fingers stuck in the dinner ladies' batter,

Mystikal
Ding-a-ling,

The bell's for you, not for me,
I graduated from charm school back in 1983,

Ballsy
Adam Hussain, I needs another lesson,
And when the bell rings, weíre going on a session,
And have a little wager to see who can pull,
The most birds, Iíve lost count, Iíve got my hands full,

2 Hats
This charm school,
Where I learns from the master,
To get my finger in, just a little bit faster,
In and out, up and down, thereís no complication,
A GLC baby's what you get for graduation,

Eggsy
Itís a simple course and it wonít involve revision,
Just 12 pints of lager in a nightclub on a mission,
His teaching style is more than just particular,
And if he likes your bits then heíll get extra-curricular,

P. Xain
I went to the university of life and the school of thought,
But I forgot all of the important things what I was taught,
Oh son, you gotta learn,
That if you take 12 pukkas youíre bound to gurn,

Adamís charm school,
(down the bus station)
Adamís charm school,
(getting education)
Adamís charm school,
(when the bell starts ringing)
Adamís charm school,
(he donít care if youíre minging)

Eggsy
Take time to study and invest, 
If you follow the charm school rules you'll be impressed,
There's no exams and it don't involve money,
Just a never-ending urge to try and get yourself some cunny,
Think style, charm and finesse,
Mix it up with Adam and then chuck him some breasts, 
Add confusion, ladies, and 27 beers,
Then wait down the clinic till the test results clears.

Adam
Smooth! Like a pane of glass,
I'm gonna kick your ass if you try and skip my class,
I'll be your knight in shining armour,
Smoking marijuana,
Whispering sweet nothings cos you knows that I'm a charmer.

Billy
Top class, you're free to enrol,
Like Pandora's box to Adrian Mole,
Or the Bee Gees, for whom the bell tolls,
Give it a shot cos every hole's a goal.

Adamís charm school,
(down the bus station)
Adamís charm school,
(getting education)
Adamís charm school,
(when the bell starts ringing)
Adamís charm school,
(he donít care if youíre minging)
Adam's charm school,
(it's like Jamie Oliver to chips)
Adam's charm school,
(so it's fingers on lips)
Adamís charm school,
(when the bell starts ringing)
Adamís charm school,
(he donít care if youíre minging)