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I am a dull and simple lad 
Can not tell water from champagne 
And I have never met the queen 
And I wish I could have all that he has got 
I wish I could be like David Watts 

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And when I lie on my pillow at night 
I dream I could fight like David Watts 
Lead the school team to victory 
And take my exams and pass the lot 

(Wish I could be) 
Wish I could be like David Watts 
(Wish I could be) 
Wish I could be like David Watts 
(Wish I could be) 
Conduct my life like David Watts 
(Wish I could be) 
I wish I could be like David Watts 

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He is the head boy at the school 
He is the captain of the team 
He is so gay and fancy free 
And I wish all his money belonged to me 
I wish I could be like David Watts 

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And all the girls in the neighborhood 
Try to go out with David Watts 
They try their best but can't succeed 
For he is of pure and noble breed 

Wish I could be like 
Wish I could be like 
Wish I could be like 

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(repeat)