Oh no, he's buying an island Oh no, he's building a boat Why does he never stop smiling? Fun surrounds him like a deep moat Where does he get all those stories? How can he tell such a lie? He's bound to see purgatory His views are in short supply But Peter Pan would understand His schemes and dreams and ploys Best keep an eye on his slight hand He such an altered boy Good God, he's talking with parrots Painting his dreams in the sand Piling up beaucoup demerits Doing it just 'cause he can By Jove he's having a cocoa Evading those judgmental eyes Calmly walking his tight rope High above all the outcries But Peter Pan would understand His schemes and dreams and ploys Best keep an eye on his slight hand He such an altered boy The story goes he stumbled at the alter Now it seems he just blasphemes And dwells with dangers daughter Someone call the talking doctor Somebody get a SWAT team There he sits getting away with murder How dare him live out his dreams But Peter Pan would understand His schemes and dreams and ploys Best keep an eye on his slight hand He such an altered boy Oh no, he's sailing today Oh no, beware Paraguay Oh no, anchors aweigh Oh no