Well, I'm a sucker for fine Cuban cigars The problem is I can't afford 'em But last year I went and got myself a whole box And just to be safe I insured 'em I took out a policy against fire and theft And then I hurried home With a thirty cent lighter I sat on my back steps And I smoked 'em one by one Two weeks later I went to see that insurance man And I handed in my claim With a straight face I told him that through a series of small fires They'd all gone up in flames They reviewed my case and they had no choice But to pay me for what I'd done And I took that check and bought a whole new box And I smoked 'em one by one Two weeks later this detective shows up Tells me that company's pressin' charges One speedy trial later they locked me up On twenty four separate counts of arson And now I sit and I stare at a blank brick wall Lookin' back on what I've done To pass the time I've got some ten cent cigars And I smoke 'em one by one Yeah, I smoke 'em one by one ©2003 EMI April Music, Inc. / Sea Gayle Music